I Desire Marriage
Like the majority of us, my story does not start with me first seeking therapy. Therapy is often the last resort. I wanted to be married and yet I kept selling myself short in relationships because I did not recognize and believe in my worth.
I looked for validation, worth and identity in my achievements, unhealthy friendships and, romantic relationships. I tried reading self-help books, attending church, talking to friends, you name it! I was blinded to the people who loved me and the things that were going well in my life.
Around the age of 30, I realized my thought process was not working. I was confused, ashamed, and hurt. I decided to trust to God for my husband. However, I got more than I imagined, I joined a women’s support group at my church which helped me see I am not alone in my struggles. I also received a few sessions of Christian Counseling. This experience helped me understand my identity in Christ and identify the lies I believed. I was no longer heavily focused on being married but developing a deep relationship with God, myself, and others. Most importantly I discovered and began to receive the love God has for me. This was an amazing experience despite the ups and downs. I was free, my life was not all of a sudden perfect but more manageable. My shame, hurt, and pain from rejection decreased. Additionally, this experience helped me discover my gift as a counselor and prompted me to change careers (no experience is ever wasted). During my counseling program, I sought further therapy and discovered my own struggle with perfectionism and fears of rejection. My life journey and therapy experiences have propelled me to help set others free from the bondages of shame, rejection, low self-worth and fears of the past and future. I want to instill hope and empower others.
My Life Today
You may be thinking, “After all this, did she get married?” No. I am currently single. However, I am appreciating the gift of singleness. Contently living a life of purpose being all God created me to be and continually growing in my self-acceptance/identity and awareness of God loving me right where I am, despite my imperfections.